Aka. "Destination Anywhere", "The Boy and Girl from County Bavaria"... After a very intense year in Würzburg (Germany), I'm back in Salamanca. I probably won't have that many experiences to write, but there's always an excuse to post a new entry!

13.

"Thanks for the dinner, it was great!" Mike said happily as he finished washing the last dish.
"Don't thank me! Thank the Shanghai Palace!" Sharon giggled "I would have cooked myself, but you'd probably run away puking if I had."
"Don't be so hard on yourself, dearie" he pulled her into a hug and kissed her lips softly.
She smiled against his mouth before breaking the kiss.
"In any case, I am the one who has to thank you for helping with the dishes."
"No big deal" he shrugged it off, winking "I love being helpful. On the other hand... I'd love a nice glass of the wine I brought in return."
"Coming right up!"
She poured two glasses as he walked back to the living-room. It had been a wonderful evening. After a walk in Mike's favourite park and an ice-cream cone while watching the sunset, they thought it would be nice to have dinner together. The Dutch girl thought it was her turn to invite him over.
"Your wine, sir" she bowed as she handed him the glass.
"Thank you, madam" he laughed, playing along.
He automatically wrapped an arm around the brunette's shoulders as she sat down and snuggled up to him. Looking at each other out of the corner of their eyes, they toasted.
"Chin-chin!" she said happily.
"Thank god we're not in Japan!"
"How comes?"
"Well, people would laugh at you for saying a very dirty word out loud" he explained with a big grin.
"Wow, sorry! But how do you know that? No, wait, let me guess - you spent a year in Japan."
"I wish. Before the record shop, I worked in a repair shop and had a Japanese coworker. He was the most fun thing about that job besides taking motorbikes for a test drive."
"You're such a typical rocker!" Sharon grinned "Music, leather jacket, motorbikes..."
"Don't forget the hot girls!" he added pulling her closer emphatically.
"Aaaw!"
As she leaned in to kiss him for the flattering comment, she accidentally turned her glass, spilling all her wine on Mike's t-shirt. She bounced back, muffling a shriek with her hands.
"Oh my god! I'm so sorry, Mike!"
Immediately she stood up, cursing her clumsiness. Yet before she could get a cloth to wash him, he grabbed her wrist, detaining her.
"It's fine" he reassured her "There's still a lot more wine."
"Yeah, but... your t-shirt..."
"Well, we have nice weather tonight."
Mike smiled as he took it off, revealing his abs and chest, all perfectly toned up. Yet instead of making Sharon gasp in wonderment, that sight brought memories of a recent conversation to her mind. Her sex talk with Marco and Johanna haunted her, stiffening her whole body.
"Is anything wrong?" the boy wondered, seeing the shocked expression on her face.
"No, I'm alright..."
"I know it's not very polite to go topless, I wish I had brought something to change into. Can I borrow something from you? Maybe Marco or one of your exes left a shirt here?"
The girl closed her eyes tightly. It looked like the moment had come.
"I don't mind, you can stay like that" she said "Sadly I don't have any clothes for men. In fact, there's something I should tell you."
She avoided Mike's questioning gaze as she sat back down next to him. In spite of how comfortable he usually made her feel, suddenly she was unbelievably tense and didn't know what to say. How would he take it?
"Are you ok, Sharon?" he held her hand, squeezing it in an encouraging way "Talk to me. You know you can tell me anything, don't you?"
His blue eyes were fixed on her, insistently. Finally she had to look back, fear written all over her face.
"Promise me you won't hate me after I've told you."
"Nothing could possibly make me hate you, Sharon."
As he said those words, he looked her in the eyes and stroked her cheek softly with his thumb. Then, to show her that he really meant it, he kissed her lovingly. Once they parted, she took a deep breath.
"The reason why I don't have any clothes for men in here is that I haven't been with a man in ages. Those exes I've told you about were female."
Just like when she first came out to her closest friends, dizziness took over her. If she had been standing, her legs would have probably started to tremble and she would have been afraid of falling. Nevertheless, Mike didn't react at all. He appeared to be surprised by the news, but he merely stared at her as though he was waiting for her to finish the phrase.
"Is that why I should hate you?" he asked after a while.
"I just thought you might not be too happy about that..."
"First of all, Sharon, the past is the past and there's no use in stressing over it. Second... what's so terrible about that? I respect everyone's sexuality, and that includes my girlfriend. I personally have no interest at all in men, so I don't know what it's like. But knowing what most guys are like nowadays, I can perfectly understand why women become lesbians."
"You mean you're ok with that?"
"Sure, why shouldn't I?" the man exclaimed "I really like you. Whatever you've done, I like you for who you are. You make me happy and that's all that matters."
She pressed her lips tightly together, still not completely convinced. Before speaking, she swallowed.
"But... the thing is... I haven't been with a man in a long time. In every sense of the word. What if...?"
"Is that what scares you?" he half-smiled as he ran a hand through her hair "Not being good enough? Well, people say that sex is something you can't forget, like riding a bicycle" he let out a chuckle "Now seriously, you don't have to worry about that at all. We'll... take the next steps... once you feel ready. No pressure. Enjoying each other's company is the most important."
All she could do was throw herself into his arms. He wrapped them around her tenderly. Sharon was about to burst into tears, but tears of joy. Could he be any more perfect? They stayed in that embrace for a while, silently. Neither could tell how long had gone by.
"Mike?" she whispered.
"Hm?"
"I... I think I'm ready."
He searched her face, eyebrows raised in surprise.
"Are you sure? I wouldn't want you to do something just because you feel compelled to do it... Do you really want to do it?"
"Mhmm" she nodded "I want to do it. I've made you wait long enough."
After a long kiss and cuddle marathon, she took his hands and led him upstairs to the bedroom. They undressed each other, lingering on every part of their bodies, interrupting the process with all sorts of touches and kisses.
Driven by passion, they took a dive on the bed. Mike was lying on top of her, smiling down at the brown-eyed beauty. They kissed once more, deeper. Lips and tongues welcomed each other excitedly. He then ran a hand down her naked torso, stopping to squeeze her breast. The gesture stole a moan from Sharon's throat. Her eyes opened abruptly.
"Are you ok?" he whispered.
"Yeah. It just... hurt a bit. I guess I'm not used to it."
"Alright."
He smiled gently and continued his journey through her skin. This time his mouth explored that porcelain neck. Yet instead of biting subtly on a few spots or leaving a trail of pecks like Tarja or Flo would do, he ran his tongue all over, wetting the path and stopping - too long for her taste - on a certain spot, where he sucked with an almost violent passion, determined to leave his mark. Sharon cursed herself for thinking of all the saliva dripping from her earlobe to her collarbone instead of getting lost in the pleasure. They were just getting started, she said to herself; it's natural to make mistakes when you're still too nervous.
Nevertheless, it didn't seem to get any better. The further down he went, the less pleasant it became. He couldn't find the secret button to her pleasure, and his sucking on her crotch was almost painful. Tarja would have known that simply licking subtly was way more effective. Flo would have teased her to no end until she almost had to beg instead of going there straight away. Even Kimberly would have found the place with her fingertips.
After a short, unsatisfying performance, Sharon cupped his face, lifting his head up from her core. Giving him a sly, sexy smile, she told him without words to start a different game. Having sex with a man is not the same as sleeping with a woman, so perhaps it was better not to try to mix both things. She thought it would probably feel better when he started doing what he had been designed for. It had been a long time since she had last experienced it, so it would probably be a nice change.
"Do you have a...?" he asked before beginning.
"Oh! I'm afraid I don't..." she bit her lip "Do you?"
"Maybe" he jumped out of bed "Someone gave me a free one on the World AIDS Day. Hopefully I'm still keeping it."
He searched the pockets of his jeans, which were lying on the floor. After fumbling in his wallet for a while, he grinned triumphantly and showed her a condom, still in its wrapping.
"Tonight is our lucky night, it seems."
She responded with a wide smile and a happy exclamation. The truth is that she was making a great job at ignoring the part of herself that felt relieved at the prospect of not fulfilling the act. Lying down again, she made herself comfortable, waiting for him to get ready to join her. Her legs were almost shivering at the excitement of feeling that sensation she had forgotten long ago again...
It wasn't the way she remembered. After a long time without something, people tend to idealize it, and that's what happened to Sharon Jansen that evening. The first thrust already made her gasp, yet not in joy or pleasure - all she felt was pain. As her lover's manhood slid into her, the sensation reminded her of a match scratching against sandpaper. Her inner muscles were contracting, making the door to her femininity tiny, as though fighting some sort of invasion. She held tightly onto his shoulders, trying to concentrate on touching him.
How could that be happening? She loved him. They still hadn't said it aloud, but she knew her feelings for him were too strong. He was attractive, charming and a total gentleman. She wanted him. Whenever they kissed or held each other, her heart skipped a beat. She enjoyed his company. Why was everything so different in bed? Why was she suddenly missing her past lovers? Her female lovers? And the worst of all was that she didn't dare to say anything. She didn't want to make him feel like he was doing something wrong, because she was absolutely sure that he was trying his best. There was nothing left for her to do but close her eyes and try to enjoy it... or at least hope it would end soon...

14.

The tiny brunette who opened the door looked about as puzzled as the one who had just knocked. It was the latter who spoke first.
"Hi! I'm looking for Johanna... guess you must be her flatmate" Sharon greeted.
"Yes, I think she's in her room at the moment" the other woman replied in her mild accent "I'll go get her."
"Thanks! I'm Sharon Jansen, by the way."
"Oh! So you're the famous Sharon!" she laughed, holding out her hand for Sharon to shake "I'm the one who's living in your old room. My name is Cristina, Cristina Di Sessa."
"Nice to meet you!"
Hearing voices and the doorbell from her room, Johanna opened the door slowly. She couldn't concentrate on studying at all; apart from the thought she couldn't get rid of, it was as though every single sound disturbed her. Thank god the results of her medical tests had arrived the afternoon after her toughest exam, and not the day before. However, seeing Sharon standing by the door felt like a ray of hope. Finally someone she could talk to!
"Hey!" she called as she caught up on Cristina "What's up?"
"Not much" Sharon smiled "I was just walking around the area and I thought it'd be nice to talk to you for a while. Hope it's not a bad time."
"No, not at all!" the redhead's face lit up "I'm not busy."
The shortest woman looked between both friends. Knowing that they'd probably have their personal things to talk about, she made an excuse and left them alone. She had to go to work an hour later, after all...
One thought crossed both their minds: Finally I can let it all out! However, neither of them had a clue how strong the other one's urge to be heard was. And by the end of the conversation, one of them would think her problem was insignificant compared to her friend's. Yet it was a long way until they got there.
"Sooo... how's everything?" Sharon asked, sitting down.
"Well, so-so" Johanna replied, joining her.
"Why's that?"
"Been having stomach problems lately..."
"Awh, I'm sorry for you!" the older woman rubbed her shoulder "Hope you're feeling better now."
"Yeah. I went to the doctor..."
"Then I'm sure they'll find out what the problem is soon and you'll get better."
Before the Austrian could retort that she had just gotten their results the day before, Sharon took a deep breath and began talking.
"Look, I really needed to talk to someone. You're gonna laugh so hard at me..." she half-chuckled.
Little did she know that Johanna wasn't really in the mood for laughing. In fact, she didn't notice that the younger girl wasn't listening to her much. She didn't realize that she was gazing distractedly ahead of herself, wondering what was going to happen to her or how everyone would react when she told them... The redhead nodded distractedly, which Sharon took as a sign to continue.
"It's about Mike. We finally slept together the other night..."
That last phrase brought Johanna back to reality.
"Really?" she wondered "How did it go?"
Sharon rubbed her forehead, releasing a frustrated sigh. The memories of her first time with him almost made her shiver.
"Not too well, I'm afraid" she admitted "I know he was pretty happy and satisfied... but I didn't enjoy it at all. I just wanted it to end. Don't get me wrong, he was a sweetheart and everything, I know he did his best... and still it didn't work."
As she continued talking, she didn't seem to be aware that her friend was nodding almost automatically, like a robot. Without paying much attention, Johanna could more or less get what she was saying. Just by catching a few words like ‘sexuality', ‘Mike', ‘women' or ‘relationships', she could tell it was all about Sharon's classical problem - her everlasting doubts. It kind of annoyed her to hear about the same topic again for the millionth time, especially when she was dealing with something bigger than that. However, she had to be a good friend no matter what.
"Have you talked to him?" she asked.
"I can't. I don't want to hurt him" Sharon shook her head.
"Don't you think that might be a good first step? If you're not happy with the way he works in bed, maybe you should tell him so he can do it better next time."
"What if he can't do it better?"
"There's only one way to know" the younger girl shrugged, putting her auburn ponytail to the side "By the way, that reminds me, there's something I need to tell you-"
"So you think I should speak to him and have sex again?" the brunette interrupted, not even hearing the last phrase "The thing is he didn't do anything wrong. It just felt horrible. I am the problem."
It took the Austrian a short while to react, still lost in her own thoughts. She gave the other woman a confused frown.
"I... what?"
"Were you listening to me at all?" Sharon exclaimed, slightly irritated "I was trying to tell you that things with Mike are not going well and I really have no clue what to do to solve it..."
"Oh, that! Same old again..." Johanna snorted "Look, Sharon, I don't want to say ‘told you so', but we all knew this would happen. You've had sex with Mike and didn't like it, which is obvious because he's a man. You tried to play straight because you found that being gay was too complicated. Now you got yourself into a mess you don't know how to get out of. Why? Because now you have to get rid of him, but you don't want to because it makes you feel like you've been using him. And that's all. Now can you please let me talk already? This is important..."
"I see... maybe you were right and I should give him another chance" Sharon began thinking aloud "I mean, sex is not the only thing in a relationship. Not that it's not important, but it's not the basis of me and Mike. Yeah, that's it" she forced a gentle smile "That's what I'm gonna do. No-one likes the first time. If it still doesn't work, I can talk to him and we'll both find a solution" now, more relieved, she turned to look at Johanna "What did you want to tell me before?"
The moment arrived. Johanna bit her lip as her heart began racing. No matter how anxious she had been to speak to Sharon or anyone else for that matter, at that moment she felt that it wouldn't be easy to say it. The way her face saddened made the Dutch girl worry.
"Jo? Are you alright?"
Her hands trembled. She had to take one more deep breath to stop the tears from falling.
"I'm pregnant."
As those words were pronounced, she began crying desperately. Still processing what she had just said, Sharon wrapped her arms around her like a reflex, letting her rest her head on her shoulder.
"Ssssh, hon! It's alright!"
"No, it's n-not!" the younger girl hiccupped.
"When did you find out?"
"Yesterday. I tried to tell you before; I went to the doctor because I had been feeling sick for a week, and I got the results yesterday afternoon."
"I see" the brunette winced "How did Marco take it?"
"He doesn't know yet. No-one does. You're the first person I've told."
"He needs to know, Jo. Who knows, perhaps he'll be happy to be a father..."
Sharon couldn't decipher the look Johanna gave her. It was a mixture between sadness, embarrassment and shock.
"I... I still don't know what I'm going to do about the b-baby" she confessed "I don't think I'm ready for something like that."
"You mean you're going to...?" the Dutch girl gasped.
"I don't know yet" Johanna sighed "I'm still considering all the different options; getting Marco involved if I put the baby up for adoption or decide not to have it at all would be cruel."
"Still, if he's the father, he deserves to know. He might be able to help you make the decision."
The Austrian let out a deep sigh. Her tears were already dry, but there was still a lot of worry on her face. Sharon had never seen her so scared; Johanna always tended to be the optimist, the practical one who knew what to do in every situation... Now there she was, her elbow resting on the sofa's arm as her head was buried in her hand.
"I don't know how this could affect our relationship" she admitted "I'm scared, Sharon. What if he thinks I'm a monster for not wanting to have it? Or what if he doesn't want anything to do with me for being so irresponsible?"
"He loves you, Jo. I'm sure he wouldn't leave you over something like that. Besides, he's a reliable guy. He won't run away from the problem - he'll do anything he can to help you."
Sharon's words seemed to be pretty reasonable. In a moment of shock, Johanna had only seen the negative side; now, feeling a bit calmer, she was beginning to realize that she had simply overreacted. For once, their roles had been switched.
"You're so right! Thanks for listening to me. I really needed it. And I'm sorry for being so rude to you before."
"Hey, you know that's what I'm here for!" with a smile, the brunette embraced her self-proclaimed little sister "And it's ok, you're terrified! I would be, too, in your situation. You know what? We should both vow to be honest to our boyfriends. I'm sure everything will be alright."