Aka. "Destination Anywhere", "The Boy and Girl from County Bavaria"... After a very intense year in Würzburg (Germany), I'm back in Salamanca. I probably won't have that many experiences to write, but there's always an excuse to post a new entry!

15.

"Miss Woods, you have a visitor" a voice spoke to her through the intercom.
"Let them in, Sarah" Angela replied, pressing the button.
She leaned back on her comfortable chair slightly, waiting for her client to turn up. Hopefully they wouldn't take long - lunchtime was getting close. When she saw her dear neighbour walk into her office with a big paper bag, all she could do was roll her eyes.
"Damn it, Tarja! I'll never get any if you keep visiting me at work and bringing me lunch. Everyone will think you're my boyfriend."
"Stop saying it like it was something bad!" the Finn ignored the warm welcome and invited herself to take the seat opposite Angela "You should be flattered that they think you're worthy of dating me."
The blonde narrowed her eyes.
"I hate you. But I take it you have something juicy to tell me and that's why you're here, so spill it."
Not without telling Sarah not to disturb her with any visitors during her lunchtime, they both started enjoying what Tarja had bought on the way to the office. As she had her first bite, she stared at her green-eyed friend.
"Let me guess - it has something to do with last night?"
"Maybe" Tarja grinned enigmatically "Well, to be honest, that's exactly what it is about."
"You're so obvious" the other woman chuckled "How did things go with Liv, then?"
"Great."
A happy exclamation escaped Angela's lips, almost making her choke on her sandwich. She knocked on her table emphatically.
"So you got laid, huh?"
"Well... no, not exactly."
"Wait. What?!"
Of course, Angela wouldn't understand it. And to be honest, if she had been speaking to her past self, she would have laughed on her face as well. Perhaps her experiences with Sharon had changed her more than she was willing to admit. In any case, she was really excited and satisfied with her budding relationship with the Norwegian. After hanging out a few times with her as friends, it felt as though the connection that had been there between them had never faded.
"It was just a great evening" she said simply "We had a lot of fun and laughed together like I hadn't in quite a while. I can't believe I had forgotten how amazing she was."
The lawyer arched an eyebrow.
"This sounds a lot like you were falling in love with her..."
"Maybe I am" Tarja sighed "I don't know, it's just like... we have such chemistry! You should have seen us, Ange. All those looks and small touches... I think she was just this close" she left a tiny space between her thumb and index finger "To kiss me goodbye. I'm thinking of asking her out."
"Seriously?"
"Yeah. She's probably waiting for me to do so anyway."
Work had given her enough experience to know what anyone meant with every tone and word. The Finn sounded really firm and determined to get what she wanted. It probably wasn't such a bad idea, she thought to herself. As much as Tarja tried to be her strong, sarcastic self, they had been friends long enough: She knew she had been rather depressed since her breakup. Yet they were not the kind to talk about such things. She would have been willing to listen if Koskela wanted to let it all out, but her friend preferred to keep things to herself, as she often did, and she respected it. Having some positive distraction would certainly do her good.
"You seem pretty convinced. I guess you know what you're doing" she finally said.
Tarja nodded.
"I'm meeting her tomorrow after work. Wish me luck."

It wasn't a good time. He was in the middle of winning that race. Interrupting a man while he's playing a videogame is never a good choice. Just like it wasn't the right moment to talk to him when he was getting ready to go to work. It was easier to pretend that she was still sleeping, so that he wouldn't start the day with a shock. Or when he called her during lunchtime to ask her to get him some things from the store. You can't tell someone such news over the phone.
The truth was that she had been avoiding him as much as she could since she found out, putting off that scary moment. Johanna sighed. She'd have to do it sooner or later, so maybe the time had come to stop making excuses and facing Marco.
"How's it going?" she sat down on the couch next to him.
"Just one more lap and the world trophy is mine!" he replied, his tongue sticking out from the side and his eyes fixed on the screen.
"That's awesome!"
She told herself she could wait one more lap. Just one more. Then everything would be over. Her eyes wandered distractedly through the hypnotic colours of the screen, showing the blurry image of some city as a car passed it by at high speed. She had no clue what was happening while her mind began making up the whole conversation, planning every single word she would say to him.
"I won!" he announced triumphantly after a few minutes, almost jumping from the couch.
"Congratulations!" she smiled.
Marco turned to his girlfriend, putting the game on pause as he handed the controls over to her.
"Wanna play?"
The idea was rather tempting, it occurred to her as she looked at the controls. Yet the reasonable part of her brain won.
"Actually, I needed to talk to you about something" she forced herself to say.
His expression changed radically. The joy of victory was replaced by a worried frown on his face.
"Is something wrong?" he wanted to know.
"Kind of" she toyed with her hair nervously "I went to the doctor..."
"Why? Are you alright?" he gasped, the control almost dropping from his lap.
"Yes, I'm fine" she swallowed "I had been feeling kind of sick lately, but it's nothing too serious. I mean, my stomach is ok and everything. Apparently, the cause was something else..."
Marco raised an eyebrow, puzzled. He almost wanted to ask her whether she was trying to confuse him deliberately or something, but she finished the phrase before he could open her mouth.
"I... I'm... about six weeks pregnant."
Silence. Johanna's gaze dropped, terrified to catch her boyfriend's blue eyes. However, if she had looked up, she wouldn't have seen any expression on his face at all.
"How... how could it happen?" he finally spoke "We always..."
"I know" she nodded "My guess is that after our anniversary dinner, when we were kind of tipsy, we forgot."
"Oh..."
He didn't say anything else. Was that all? She expected a much more intense reaction than just wanting to know how it happened, which was pretty obvious. It wasn't his fault, though - he was probably as shocked as she was.
"I just wanted to let you know" Johanna said after a long pause.
"I see."
"And... well, how do you feel about it?"
The way he looked at her was undecipherable. He furrowed his brows, as if the question caught him absolutely by surprise.
"How I feel about it?" he repeated.
"Mm-hm."
Marco shrugged.
"I'm... fine, I guess. I don't know what you want me to say."
Johanna shook her head. He couldn't be serious, could he? She was starting to feel hurt and disappointed by his indifference.
"You're the father, Marco. Don't you have anything to say about that?"
First he scratched the back of his neck. Then he swept his blond hair to one side. He looked like he was avoiding her eyes. It took him a century to react.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to."
A snort emerged from her throat. The Austrian was starting to get desperate.
"So that means you're not happy about it" she tried to read from his answer.
"No, I didn't say that" Marco corrected "I can't be happy about it now. Or sad. It's like... I can't believe it yet, you know?"
"I know. Me neither..." she sighed "I was just hoping you could help me."
"What do you mean, help you?"
"I don't know what to do about it. About the baby, I mean. There are several options and I don't know which one would be the right thing to do. I guess you would also want to have a say on that."
"Thanks for taking me into account" the other man half-smiled.
"Well, how could I not? It's your child, too. It would be selfish of me to abort without even asking you what you think."
In an almost unnoticeable way, the Swede's face was covered by a small, yet dark cloud.
"You mean you're not having the baby?"
"I'm not sure yet" she recognized "I don't think I'm ready to be a mother. Maybe I'm terrible and ruin the baby's life, so I'd better put it up for adoption or simply abort. But then, it's also yours and maybe you don't agree..."
"It's your decision, Johanna."
"And it's a really hard and important one, so it would be nice to get some help or another opinion!"
"I can't tell you what to do" Marco said seriously.
"Why not?"
"Because it's you who's going to have the bigger problem."
Her green eyes filled with pain.
"You're walking away from this?" she raised her voice slightly."
"I'm not!" he exclaimed "I think you misunderstood me. What I was trying to say is that it's your life that's going to go through the more dramatic change. So it's fair that you make the decision. I could give you my opinion, but I don't want to influence you" putting the control aside, he moved closer to her and took both her hands in his "That doesn't mean I'm not going to be there for you. If you decide to have an abortion, I will drive you to hospital myself. And if you don't, I'll be there to help you raise the baby."
Finally, she smiled softly. He hadn't quite helped her make the decision, but his reaction was probably the best someone could have had. Knowing that she could count on his support made her feel enormously relieved. As he took her in his arms, suddenly the problem didn't seem that big anymore. Still, she would give herself two more weeks to think it through.